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As I made my way to the cafeteria early in the morning something caught my eye, who was that guy hugging Sarah Trevena, if you ask me, Sarah is a really nice girl however it’s her crowd I disagreed with, I couldn’t help but feeling a swing of jealousy as that boy hugged her off her feet, dark guy, with black hair high cheekbones, long lashes and a jaw line that left me star struck, they looked so cute together and I couldn’t help but wonder who that guy is?, he was wearing the schools uniform so he must be from here, I am sure Jessie would be thrilled to discuss this with me over a pair of binoculars! And there she was sitting at the lunch table in the middle of the dining hall, where Jessica, Harry, Liam, Josh Welsh; a tall black guy on the football team, he was really nice but I never trusted him, Martin O’brien; an Irish boy that had orange hair and freckles nevertheless he was handsome, Leyla Hemis; a girl from the middle east and oh was she an Arabian beauty, her complexion was not light but not dark as if she was born with a natural tan, her long eye lashes compliment her dark black eyes, along with her silky smooth black hair, and Sally Mellark, the funniest person I’ve ever seen, if you’d ask me to describe a British girl then you’d probably get Sally! blonde hair, pale complexion and lots of freckles on her arms!
However something didn’t seem right, Jessica tried to smile at me but I knew her too well to know when she is about to burst out crying, I quickly took her by the arm, and made my way to the exit just as Liam came in, with Natasha Brown under his arms, and I instantly did the math, I glared at him as I opened the door, and I took Jessica to the remorse lawn; I really find the story of this lawn to be disturbing but the lawn in so big, and so beautiful you are bound to be left alone here, back in the year 2000 the school punished 4 students who were caught smoking by making them clean the paved floor that was built there, and when it started to rain, they kept them outside and when they came to check for their work the following day they found them dead, all four of them have died, no one knows the reason yet, some say they were struck by lightning, and some say they were slaughtered all we know is that the school made this, the most beautiful place on campus in their honor.
After around 15 minutes of comforting Jessica, she finely was well enough to talk to me, I knew of course but I wanted to hear it from her, she started to tell, and then I froze! And suddenly I am the one fighting the tears, “you a-a-and Harry?”I asked, “you and Harry Styles? The boy you know I love?” I just stared at her for a few minutes, she couldn’t look me in the face and I knew how much she was hurting over the Liam thing, but she just caused me the same thing, and without even stopping to think about it I slapped her and stormed off. And even though I tried I couldn’t get away from the lawn, it was my comfort zone after all, and as I saw Kimberly run towards Jessica I knew what was going to happen, and I have made my mind that I will just sit here and watch.
“you bitch” Kimberly yelled out to Jessica, Jessica turned around and started to stare at Kimberly in a way that was anything but friendly, “what do you want?” asked Jessica, and then Kimberly yelled at her “how dare you kiss Harry, how dare you be his girlfriend? Everyone in this school knows that Harry wants me, not you, me!”, “well it doesn’t look like it” Jessica said, and I couldn’t help but feel a slight jolt of happiness because I could tell that Kimberly was burning inside, “I will have him by the end of the term, you hear me?” Kimberly belted out while observing Jessica leave in the other direction,poor Jessica not only has she lost me, her best friend but she will be hated by almost every single girl in school, after all, you don’t just simply date Harry Styles, he is almost every girls’ crush.
As harry and I made our way back to the dinning hall, my head was pounding, what was this kiss? And why am I feeling dizzy after it? How come we are holding hands? Am I in love with Harry Styles? Too many questions, and not enough answers, “Jess, come on let’s sit down at this bench” harry exclaimed, and as he pulled me by my hand out of the paved lane and onto he chair I rested my head on his shoulder and he began to explain everything, as if reading through my mind “do you believe in love at first sight Jess?” he asked, and at first I was going to say no but then I remembered Liam, “yes, yes I do” I replied, “well I didn’t, at least before I saw you, and then well then I was a believer!, from the moment I saw you talking to Naya at the start of this year I was madly in love with you, and that kiss, well hopefully that kiss said it all” I stared at him for a second and then I blinked “harry, I..” he slowly reached out and put his hand on my lips “let me finish, all my life I have dated some, gone out will allot, but never in my life have I felt what I feel for you, and I can’t even think straight, and” he hesitated for a moment “and I want you to be mine, be my girlfriend Jessica and I promise you that happy is what you will be” he took my hand and planted a small kiss on it, and looked straight into my eyes.
I went blank, how was I supposed to respond to that? One of the most handsome boys in school says that he has had a crush on me ever since he saw me, he said that it was love at first sight, and that was the word that got to me “love” never have I been told by a boy that he loves me, and now Harry just confessed to me that I am the love of his life, as I drifted away into a flashback harry was still looking at me.
I heard the distinctive sound of squealing, I knew right away that Kimberly was laughing, but what was it this time, I backed my chair a little and started to listen to the conversation “oh my god, Harry Styles was totally checking me out” said Kimberly in her ridiculous tone, Kimberly is one of the most beautiful people I have ever seen in my life, she has dark skin, glossy black wavy hair and her sparkling brown eyes compliments the whole thing “oh god! You are so lucky Kimberly, the only person giving me attention is that pedophile that teaches us geography!” replied Sarah, a red headed girl with green eyes and a really pale skin, she was beautiful and had never went to school with make up on, so I guess she was a bit decent, “well, Harry Styles is handsome you have to admit however, I have my eyes on a different guy, and I know that I will get him and when I do, well lets just say that every eye will be on me,” barked Natasha, “who is it Nat, you have to tell us, we are your best friends!” replied Lillian in that urging tone of hers, Lillian was not even pretty, she was just rich, filthy rich, which was the only reason people liked her. “no! that will be a surprise until the day I have him between my fingers” and I could tell that she was smiling that sly smile of hers, which really got to me. The bell rang announcing the end of this class I quickly gathered my things and hurried to tell Naya all about this.
I felt harry’s hand squeeze mine, as if urging me to decide, will I date him or will I compromise our friendship, even though he never said it, I knew he only wanted me as a girlfriend and if I refused I knew that we will be no longer friends “Yes, of course I’ll be your girlfriend” I said before I can stop myself, instantly I felt that I’ll be regretting this, and that I will definitely be heartbroken. But let’s look at the bright side, harry was a gentleman, he was oh so handsome and maybe just maybe he’ll grow on me!
But then at that moment when I was hugging harry, right after he gave me the cheekiest grin I have ever seen , it hit me, Naya is going to be so mad.
Allot has been going through my mind lately, what with school, the hit and run a week ago, and now Jessica crying on my shoulders was one more thing I had to deal with, on the other hand the fact that now she was vulnerable was a spark of hope to me as I hugged her and whispered the words “shh, it’s okay!, let it out,” she pulled away and started to tell me about how much she loved liam, and how devastated she was that he was going out with the school’s tramp, Natasha Brown, and the only response I gave was “well, that’s another reason for me to hate him!” , and to that she replied by giving me a confused look as If reminding me that I should be helping her out, not talking about my personal issues, “come on jess, let’s go out for a walk!” , she took my outstretched arms and hugged me and I did the same. Campus at night was beautiful and the fact that most of the students went out to that fare they were holding in town, making campus almost empty was even better, and as we made our way to the small grassy slope overlooking the whole campus she looked up at the sky, she was admiring the stars the same way I was admiring her beauty, and as she looked at me she blushed, “what’s up? Why are you looking me like that! It’s awkward”, I put my right arm around her waist, she was not moving, we were just looking into each others’ eyes, and as I took hold of her hand with my left arm, I pulled her closer to me, I felt her breath on the tip of my chin, as she was looking up at my face, and as I closed the distance between us , I felt it! As if there are fireworks in my stomach, as if every good feeling in the world was put together and released right here, right now when my lips met hers, and as we broke off, slowly I opened my eyes, and for a second hers were still closed, she was still holding her breath, and then she opened her eyes, and exhaled!, and her eyes were glowing, we stayed there, in that position just looking at each other for about a minute before locking our lips together for a second time and this time, well it lasted longer, much longer, and this time, she kissed me back.
As Jessica and I made our way back to the dining hall, we were holding hands, but it was not the same friendly gesture we used to do, it was the one I always dreamed about, ever since I first laid my eyes on her, the butterflies in my stomach were gone and replaced with a feeling I can never describe, and this is how I want it to be, her and myself hand in hand against the whole world.
I have had a few crushes throughout my teenage years, but never had any feeling that can compare to what I feel towards Liam, whenever I see his smile, my heart skips a beat or two or ten, and when he looks at me with that look of his, well I hear the choirs of heaven, but every time I remember he just wants me as a friend, every time I remember that he probably thinks I am ugly and every time I remember how out of my league he is, well it feels like my chest has been smashed against hard concrete floor and what annoys me the most is that he is right there in front of me and to not be able to just walk up to him and kiss him is slowly eating at me!
“Jessica, perhaps you can provide us with the answer, or remind your classmate Mrs. Brown what the question is in the first place” my teacher exclaimed with one eyebrow raised, as if daring me to answer, I glanced over to Natasha and smiled a smile that obviously failed to hide my true feelings towards her ;disgust, she was hiding under a layer of makeup, her bra was pink, with Natasha you can always tell, and she was chewing gum like an idiot, however, she looked gorgeous! With her blonde hair, green eyes, and slender body I was jealous of Natasha Brown.
And then I was distracted by the whiff of heaven that goes under the name Liam, but what was about to happen was obviously pure hell, and the work of the devil himself! As Liam apologized for being late to class he made his way to the empty seat next to me, or so I thought, he smiled at me and walked past me and pulled up a chair and sat next to Natasha, he kissed her lightly on the cheek, and my world went crashing above my head, and oh did it hurt.
I used to rule the world
Sees would rise when I gave the world
Now in the mornings I sleep alone,
Sweep the streets I used to own
I used to roll the dice, feel the fear in my enemies’ eyes
Listen as the crowd would sing: now the old king is dead, long live the king,
As I was singing in front on the Xfactor judges I was slowly observing Simon, I knew that it was his opinion that counts, and I wanted to impress him so bad,
I hear Jerusalem bells are ringing
Roman Calvary choirs are singing
Be my mirrors my sword my shield
I was really nervous, but I held my emotions well, it was this thing about me that I hated, and loved at situations like these, you see I am just a little insecure about expressing my emotions, that is why I want a girlfriend that shows every thread of emotion the instance she feels it, and that is why I want Jessica even more, not only is she one of the most beautiful girls I have ever seen, well maybe not one of the hottest, but definitely one of the most beautiful, I have always believed that beautiful and hot are two different things, beautiful is not only pretty from the outside but from the inside as well and she never, ever flaunts it, I even have this feeling that she disagrees with her being unbearably gorgeous, hot is simply an adjective given to those who were blessed with a good face and figure and also “blessed” with the attitude to flaunt it at any opportunity possible, which is why I always prefer beautiful over hot.
Anyways, Jessica is just beautiful, and if you ask me, she is perfect! As if she was carefully crafted in the heavens above and descended down to earth.
As I belted out the last verse of my audition song, I closed my eyes tight, I have never been good at this note, but I don’t know what it was but it made me ace it, I got a standing ovation from one of the judges the cute female one sitting in the middle, however it was Mr. Cowel I was interested in, what was he going to say?, “ that was amazing, however” he continued, “I felt that you are giving me 80%, and to be honest I am a greedy man, I want my 20%” I panicked for a moment, “ I promise you that 20% next time”, I said looking as innocent and sincere as I possibly could, and he fell for it! Not that I was setting him up or something, I will definitely give him that 20%, and this is how I made it to boot camp, and on my way out I felt my phone vibrating, and I hoped it was her and when I saw the caller ID I yelled out “Jessie, YES, just in time” to the phone right after I answered the call “so, guess what?, your “lee”” (referring to the nickname she calls me by) is going to be a celebrity now, so I guess you’ll need to call for an appointment before we hang out!” I backed the phone away from my ear for an instance since she was shouting and when I heard her stop I closed the distance between the phone and my ear “love you jessie, bye”, I heard that silence, as If gasping for breath she always did when I told her I loved her, of course she thought I meant that I loved her in a friendly way, and then she replied with the usual “me more lee, bye love”, and I hung up.
For sophomore Harry Styles, this academic year has not started well, in fact it is one of the worst years he had ever been through by far, as he sat in his hospital wing he had a flash back: it was middle school and he was swimming, for he was athletic once upon a time, and then suddenly he was gasping for breath, he struggled as he descended to the depth of the pool, his chest was burning by now, his vision was fading and then he was back with his cousin Rebecca they were both running on a stream, and as Harry was wondering how he was running on the surface of the water so effortlessly he paused and told her “bec, I am not ready to leave! I don’t want to!”, she looked at him with the gorgeous blue eyes that ran in the family, and smiled while muttering the words “then don’t”, and with that he was on the cold surface of the bench by the pool someone was giving him CPR and he finally coughed up all the water he inhaled, and gasped for breath! Since then, harry could not play sports, his lungs were damaged, and he is simply phobic of water, that was the worst year he had ever experienced for that was only the start, the year that followed that miserable incident made the drowning look like a broken tooth. As harry got up from the bed, he looked at the calendar Jessica has got him, since he complained about how he was losing track of time, it was one week after the Xfactor auditions and he was getting released from this “miserable prison of health” in an hour, as he made his way to the bathroom he saw her, lying on the couch, the love of his life. In order for you to understand this story better, dearest reader, you need to know one thing about Harry is that he has a personality that contradicts with its self, so he is a ladies man by nature, however when it comes to the women he truly loves, he simply does not have the nerves to confess or even flirt, but as he saw the angelic face of Jessica snoring, he had felt confidence, after he was out of here, he will tell her, he will confess to Jessica his love to her, he will tell her that she is the one he wants and he will ask her out, properly , and for the first time ever, Harry Styles is going to be a gentleman with the woman he loves.
I was running, not afraid nor excited and I saw the dark silhouette of a tall man , however there were two of them. I stopped “Liam? Harry? What is wrong”I wondered, “why are you both dressed up with angel wings, and harry why are yours black?” harry simply looked at me, suddenly I saw food, it was a blonde boy, he was holding it up high, a table as large as my dorm room filled with every single type of food a man can possibly imagine, he was a leprechaun, but one gorgeous leprechaun, blonde hair, blue eyes, and just a glow about him that made me smile, however when I looked back at the two angels facing me, they were battling, the battle was fierce and Liam held up a knife and struck it aiming at Harry’s chest, who in turn jerked away, and stabbed Liam in the liver with a long, dagger made out of fire, Liam yelled, fell to the floor, and started pouring gold. And with this Jessica woke up, she was at Harry’s hospital wing, and he was staring at her with a look she never saw before which she explained as concerned for she must have made some noises after that nightmare “don’t ask” she said, as she went to the cafeteria to get them both a cup of coffee.
I received a text from an unknown number “so you are auditioning for the x-factor as well? Jessie seems to find it important for us to bond, so meet me at the parking lot at 5 AM sharp, we will go together to the audition – Liam.” I read the message over and over again each time the feeling I had just kept getting worse, and I didn’t know what to do, but since I did tell my parents that I was going with a classmate they went on to their holiday trip to the Maldives, and are probably above the ocean now, I just frowned at it one last time, set my alarm and went to bed, and as always, all I thought of was her, Jessica the girl of my dreams and she took over just in time for I was nervous and the thought of her calmed me.
I woke up at the annoying song that is my alarm, I used to love this song but since I put it as my alarm I don’t anymore, if I could give one single advice to humanity it would be that they should never put a song they like as their alarm, ever.
As I made my way to the parking lot 30 minutes later, I stood on the small paved drive-through that is made so that parents can pick up students, and after 2 minutes, I was shot into the air, I was sliding down the hood of a car, everything was blurry, I was hit by a car, I think I was, the driver pulled me out of the way, and put me on the sidewalk and left, I was groaning but no sound came out, and then I saw Liam, his ride arrived and he told the driver something, he waited a bit, and then took out his cell phone for a minute and put it back into his pocket, as I watched from my resting place between the bushes where I was placed by whoever hit me, he could not see me, I felt my cell phone vibrate inside the pocket of my jeans, and as I tried to call out for him I fainted, while hearing the sound of a car driving away.
There I missed it, I missed the chance for my dreams to come true, and as I fell into darkness I was miserable both because of the pain that just struck me, and the depression of missing out on my chance to become a star, an icon in the music industry.
“harry please, harry please wake up” a familiar voice was calling out, I opened my left eye, however my right eye was not in the mood to cooperate and thus it stayed shut, I saw Jessica and heard Naya’s voice, she must have been on my right side, but I was too tired to look around, and after telling them exactly what happened, Jessica reached out for my cell phone and checked the message I mentioned before “harry, where the hell are you, come on we are leaving in 5 minutes, if you don’t show up you will have to make it there on your own –Liam”, and then with a yelp Jessica took out her cell phone and dialed a number, I knew who she was calling, nevertheless I asked, and to no one’s surprise the answer was :“Liam, I want to ask him about the audition!”, after a call full of yells of joy and congratulations asking her whether he made it or not was simply pointless, all I can do now is sit here looking like a mess and not feeling a tad better either, if Liam did make it, then I bet I could ,only if I did get the chance he got, for some reason I was hating this guy more and more by the second.
I was running really fast, I never run but this was something big, and I had to tell her! it’s funny how 2 weeks ago we were just classmates sitting next to each other in our mutual classes, we laughed together, but now it’s like we are one, we are truly best friends, as I arrived to the 3rd girl’s dorm, I took out my phone and dialed the number I now know by heart , “yello mr. styles” the familiar voice on the line spoke. The American accent as unusual as ever, “you g-go down to the door this instance” I breathed out, “okay I am on my way” she responded before hanging up, and after five minutes I saw her, I couldn’t help but smile since I was always bad at hiding my feeling she was my friend and when I see friends I get happy and smile which to me is really annoying but others think it’s nice and reassuring.
As we sat down on the lawn I told her about what’s got me worked up, and she just sat there and listened, the conversation went on like this “naya, this is really something I never told anyone ever before!, however I love singing! I just do, I don’t know why and I don’t even know when it even begun, ever since I was a young kid I was always singing! And I am going to audition for the X-factor this month” “oh my god! Harry styles, a globally recognized artist, imagine that however you will have to promise me that you will not forget about me!” as she went on talking all I could do was laugh, Naya always drifted away in her own head, but just picturing the thought gave me chills, what if I was meant to be an international artist, what if I was the next Bruno mars, “anyways, good luck styles, and would you please, please sing Who’s laughing now for Jessie j in your audition, please?” she added while giving me an innocent face, I laughed and told her that I would definitely sing Jessie j, but it was what’s going through my head that got to me, Jessica was all I can think of, her beautiful smile, the way she jumps on my back and demand piggy back rides, when she adjusts my hair, the nickname she calls me, I mean hazza, what a beautiful name coming out from her, but finely the hugs we share, those were the highlights of my day, did she ,however, think of me the same way?, or was I simply added to the list of newly acquired friends?, does she think of me last before going to bed, does she daydream about a date with me, or am I just seeking something out of my league ? Anyways, “better go tell jessie” I exclaimed to Naya, who was just staring at me for some reason,” okay, good luck, call me when you finish the audition” she replied.
She was standing there, with that sophomore Liam, of course she would be standing with him, smiling at him, and looking down whenever he did the same, he was on the school’s basketball team, and he didn’t look bad himself, I called out for her and saw her give him a hug that lasted a bit too long, and as she approached me I mouthed the words “HAZZA, X-FACTOR, TOMORROW” , she stood there still, and looked back and yelled “oh my god, so is Liam, you guys can go together, to get to know each other a bit!” “wha-what?, god no, you know I don’t like him!” however midway through that sentence she gave me the cutest look ever and said “please?, for me?” and after that, I couldn’t refuse, and I just stood there staring as she ran after him to tell him that I will be joining him on his way to the x-factor auditions.